I rarely post in here but I'm looking for soem advice. I posted this on a message board I participate in but thought I'd check with other singleparents and see what advice any of you might have.
My oldest 2 boys are both ADHD and are medicated. They come by it honestly from me.
I was one of those parents that denied it for way to long in my oldest and the ADHD was masking learning disabilities as well. He struggled in school horribly and was WAY below grade level. He still struggles but thanks to his medication and testing and additional help he is doing better and at the begginning of this year tested at grade level for the first time ever
However the last several months have seen all of that progress almost disappear. He was on Adderal XR at 15 mg and it was not as effective anymore. After a visit to the doctor we switched him to Vyvanse at 50 mg. I got a call from the school nurse and his resource teacher with the concerns that the new med was not working. he was fidgeting all the time, could not focus and concentrate. basically acting as if he was not on his meds. So we switched him to Focalin XR at 15 mg which is the same meds my 7 year old is on and it works great for him. He is much higher on the hyperactive scale than the oldest one.
Still he struggled. He became defiant (bordering on violent) to everyone...his teachers, the daycare, me, his brothers. It all came to a head yesterday and today. The nurse called worried as his gait and corrdination even seemed off. I spoke to him on the phone as I was not happy with his behavior (I can't blame all of it on his meds he still knows right from wrong and that his behavior is not acceptable. Having a hard time focusing does not give him license to be a jerk and act out and he knows this. I don't let either of them use the ADHD as an excuse for bad behavior) and as he was telling me all that was going on his speech even sounded a bit slurred.
I called the doctor and we are going back to the Adderal XR at 20 mg this time and seeing how that works. I hate this merry go round of meds. I don't know what to do for him. It's awful watching him struggle and get frustrated. He is angry now at alot and the anger and frustration stems from struggling so much at school. (I'm waiting a second call from the doctor to discuss the coordination and slurred speech issues as this was not known by me the first call this morning to him and has me worried).
Is anyone's kids going thorugh this and what advise might you have? We (the school and I) have tried several things over the past 4 years and somethings work while others just leave us and him banging our heads up against a wall. It's bad enough to have the learning disabilities but add the ADHD on top of that and its tough to watch and deal with.
I've done some research on the web and am continuing to look but was wondering if anyone here has gone through this and might have some suggestions or recommendations I can take to the school and the doctor.
An added update to this message, when I oicked my boys up from daycare, I had a note detailing some of what happened with the oldest son before school that partly set things in motion today. He had a rough day on the daycare van adn didn't want to buckle up. Everytime they would buckle him he would undo it and yell at them. He told one of the workers to "F**k off!" and said "I'll kill you!". This is not the boy I know and love. He has become very defiant and angry and I don't know if its because of growing pangs, puberty or what. He is suspended from the van tomorrow so I have NO idea how to get him to and from school back to the daycare. I am currently without a car (apparently in the state of AZ if you run a red light you can't just pay the fine you also HAVE to do traffic school. I paid the fine. 4 years later I'm pulled over for a light being out and instead of a warning my car is impunded for 30 days...we aren't having Christmas because it's costing me close to $1,000 before I even go to court to get my car back), and I can't take him and pick him up. I'm going to PLEAD with the director and explain its most likely a med issue and pray she'll give him another chance, or wait until I have a car and can do something. Otherwise I really don't know what to do. He should have some punishment and don't want him to get away this behavior but I also am out of options and being able to get him to school. I am at my wits end and I don't know what to do.