June 20th, 2001

(no subject)

Hello all! I'm new to this place. I am 21, mother to a 9 1/2 month old girl, named Jyliannah Lorynne. My ex and I were together for three years, and ON our three year anniversary, when our daughter was 9 weeks old, he left me for an 18 year old girl... He pays child support, and sees our daughter once a week. I wish he saw her more often, but he is too busy with his girlfriend and work... He fought in court to get half legal custody of our daughter, so he can help make decisions about her, and he fought to get two days a week visitation, and he could care less... Ahh well. So now, i was with this new guy and we just broke up because he can't handle the fact that I am a mother... Life is weird!
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I've been thinking alot about my parenting skills. About how I use my time. And I am just not happy. So... I am going to list some goals...

1. Have dinner WITH my kids EVERY night, at the table. Normally, they eat at the table and I eat whenever, where ever. I think we need to eat dinner together. Ok, honesty time. Usually I am in front of the computer while I eat and they are at the table in the dining room, OR at the coffee table in the living room watching TV while they eat. I hate that.

2. Read to them every day. I realize some days I won't be able to. For example, Tues. nights we just don't have time. We get home at 10pm and the kids go straight to bed. But for the most part, I can read to them every night. Since we just signed up at the library for the annual summer reading program, which I LOVED to participate in as a child, I am thinking this will help motivate ALL of us!

3. PRAY with them each night (and morning too!) Kids learn by example, and I am not a very good example when it comes to this. I should probably add, pray before each meal too, as we let this slip alot.

4. A hug and kiss a day along with "I love you" We say I love you alot, but we don't hug and kiss as much as we used to. Dylan is my cuddly one. Zack is really cuddly too, but is shy and backs off. But I think we could use some more of that closeness. I grew up in a very UNaffectionate home, and I don't want my kids to have to do that.

5. Take them to the park or play WITH them outside at LEAST once a week. Usually I send them out back and they play, or I take them to the park (occasionally) and they play, but I don't really interact/play WITH them. I don't know why. I used to babysit two little boys, same ages my kids are now, and I used to LOVE playing with them. It's almost like I have forgotten HOW to play. Kinda sad. I would like to have that back.

More to come later.
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